Nate Nate

This One's For Lisa

Frequent readers of this blog have probably encountered a number of anecdotes involving Lisa, friend of the blogger and mom of 3 highly entertaining little girls.  Although Lisa does not have her own blog, this story was too funny to risk losing to the faulty workings of our mommy brains, so I am recording it here.  You'll thank me in ten years, Lisa.

So there was some debate among 6 year old twins Sophie and Tess about where to post a reminder note; Sophie voted for on the door to their room, and Tess felt that inside the room would be more approriate.  In the words of Tess, the child of two lawyers: "If we put it inside the room, we'll see it, whereas if we leave it on the door, we'll walk right by without seeing it."  (Emphasis added.)

I'm sorry, how many 6 year olds do you know who use the word "whereas?"

It's So Noisy At the Fair

Went to the fair today.  Nate went on the giant Banana Splits slide, but he wasn't much for the rides, so we don't have too many pictures of him.  Jonah couldn't get enough of the rides, though.  And we all got Mike Tyson-style henna face tattoos!  (Not really.)  [Edited by Mommy to add: Yes, Nate looks terrified and miserable in this picture, but we swear that he was neither.  He was all excited about the ride, which poor Jonah turned out to be too short (!) to go on, and he sprinted to the top of a very tall staircase all by himself, after which he eagerly jumped on, slid down excitedly, looked unhappy for exactly one second (as Steve snapped this picture), and then resumed beaming.  He then refused to go on anything else, including the same slide, but he did note that watching Jonah go on rides was really fun.] 

 

 

 

Lost: One Tooth

Tooth number 3 has been very, very loose for some time now.  Nate has not been as excited for me to yank it out as I have been eager to yank it out.  "Can I wiggle your tooth now?" I have been asking,  sometimes upward of 50 times per day.  "No," Nate has been answering calmly, sometimes upward of 50 times per day.  "How about now?" I have been responding.

Today, some time between mid-morning snack and toothbrushing, Nate lost his tooth.  When we were getting ready to brush his teeth, he slipped off the bathroom stool, and when he resurfaced, I asked, jokingly, "Gee, is your tooth still there?"  It was not.  But we have no idea what happened to it!  A meticulous search of the bathroom floor turned up nothing.  Very, very strange.  And no blood!  And no pain!  And no tooth!

It seems like only yesterday when the loss of a tooth was a monumental occasion.  Now, it barely warrants a shrug and a cottonball before moving on.  Sigh.

Edited by Daddy to add:  Nate seems to think that this tooth is worth $600.07, according to the note he left for the tooth fairy.  Here's the note the Tooth Fairy left in response: 

Dear Nate:

Thank you for your note.  It is wonderful to see you again.  I have missed your excellent teeth in the months since the last time I bought one from you. 

 

I left you $2.00 for your tooth.  I know you were hoping for $600.07, but that seems to be a mistake.  That is the amount of money that I leave when a kid leaves a 1989 Mazda 323 under his pillow.   My current price list for teeth, which I last updated in December 2008, is:

First Tooth	$5.00
Second through Twentieth Teeth	$1.00 or $2.00, depending upon how many children lost their teeth that day
Twenty-First through Fifty-Second Teeth (adult teeth)	$5.00, a DVD, and a libation if legally allowed

Usually I only leave money if the kid actually puts the tooth under his pillow.  This is because I need the teeth for my art projects.  Right now I am doing an art project where I am gluing all of the teeth to my car (a 1989 Mazda 323).  It is almost done.  It looks really cool. 

 

Anyway, I know you can't find your tooth.  If you do find it, please put it under your pillow and I will pick it up when I get a chance. 

 

It was a pleasure doing business with you. 

 

Love,

 Mrs. Tooth Fairy

Warm, Warmer, Colder

Nate was looking at a book of various signs that one might see around the world, and he came to a page showing a man (the universal sign-man -- that rounded stick-figure man that you see on signs in airports and at the Olympics) urinating.  Nate didn't get it (frankly, neither did I -- I guess it was a sign for a restroom or something).  So I asked, "Nate, what is he doing?"  Nate didn't know. 

I told him that the dotted line was water.

"He's watering?" Nate asked. 

Where, I asked, is the water coming from? 

"His belly button?" 

No, I said.

"His leg?" 

No, I said. 

"His lower intestine?"

After a good laugh, I gave him the answer.

Five-Tool Players

The boys had their first tee-ball (or, if you're a strict adherent to trademark distinctions, "t-ball") lesson, which focused on the fundamentals.  Namely, watching the ball roll past you and then running after it, hitting the tee as hard as you can so that the ball falls off of it, and running from first to second to left field as fast as you can while everybody shouts "third base!" 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Birthday; Mystery Day

Nate had an actual birthday, and an actual birthday smile: 

 

He and Jonah were happy to brandish the golf clubs he got for his birthday: 

 

On Sunday, we made our return to the Mystery Spot, this time with both reservations and Grandma Nan.  First, a quick snack:

 

 

 

Then it was on to the strange Mystery Spot, in which gravity has been severely compromised:

 

I Guess They're Not Born Knowing How To Identify Hyperbole

"Mommy," Daddy said, "Jonah and I need you to settle a dispute we've been having.  He says he wants to ride on a motorcycle.  I told him no, but he said that you said he could."

I stared at Jonah in shock, dismayed that he would tell such a whopping fib.  "I told him, 'Over my dead body!!!!'"

Jonah beamed.  "See???"

Apparently he took that as a "yes."

America's Got Talent: Freakay Edition

Aaaaaaand so apparently, if you give Nate a date, any date (so far only tested in the years 2008 and 2009, but who knows), he will tell you what day of the week it was/will be.  It's some combination of memorizing when certain dates occurred and calculating from there as if the calendar days were just straight numbers in multiples of 7.  And he can sorta explain how, but not quite.  For example:

Me: "Nate, what day of the week was Valentine's Day this year?"

Nate: "Hmm, let me think.  February began on a Sunday, so that's 13 more days, so... Saturday."

Me: "HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT??"

Nate: "Because it's 13 days later!"

Me: "No, how did you know that February began on a Sunday??"

Nate: "Because January ended on a Saturday!"

Me: "Ok, how did you know that January ended on a Saturday?"

Nate: "???? Because it did! (duh)"

or

Me:  "What day was July 11 last year?"

Nate [with approx 2.1 seconds hesitation, mind obviously whirring]: "Friday."

Me: "HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?????"

Nate: "Well, because the 4th of July was on a Friday last year, and the 11th is 7 days later, so it's the same day."

Personally, my head hurts just thinking about it.

America's Got Talent

Before I get to the videos, a story:  I tried to take the kids to the Mystery Spot in Santa Cruz, but when we got there it was booked up.  So we made a quick detour to Henry Cowell State Park, where there's a nice, short, flat hike among some really cool redwoods, including a few that you can climb in and through.  We had been there once before, about a year ago, when Jonah was two-and-a-half.  So of course as soon as we got there on Sunday, Jonah exclaimed, "Daddy!  We're going to the place where you can go inside the tree!  And you can walk through the hole!  And there's a lake!"  Actually, it's a river.  What a terrible memory that kid has of that thing that happened a third of his life ago. 

Anyway, on to the videos.  Jonah, who again is three-and-a-half, reads a book that Uncle Dave gave us some time ago.  Nate plays "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" as it was taught to him in the key of C, and then just for good measure he plays it in the keys of D, E, F, G, A, and B, which he figured out on his own:

Posted by Daddy.

I'm A Little Offended At Just How Dumb Jonah Thinks I Am

Jonah asked for some Nemo snacks.  "Sure," I said, "you can have some as soon as you finish the rest of your sandwich."  Jonah trotted off agreeably.

A moment later, he walked by me on his way to the trash can, little hands behind his back and not at all concealing the sandwich cupped in them.  "I'm all done, Mommy!" he announced.

I mean, I was standing right there.  Seriously?